OK so I've just come to unpack and I am missing two socks. They aren't even the same pair but one from a casual grey pair and rather expensive Sealskinz waterproof pair. What is weird is that I hadn't even worn them on this trip. I've got everything else. I left with fourteen socks, seven pairs. Now I have twelve socks, six pairs and two completely unmatched ones. How?
The Answer : Eater of Socks
A pseudo-mythical creature that lives only to eat socks, and leaves a trail of odd pairs in its wake.
I say "pseudo" because there is evidence to prove it exists but not many can claim to have seen it. Sightings of this elusive creature are rare and unsubstantiated. It's habitat is thought to be somewhere between the sock drawer and the washing machine. Other theories place the sock eater closer to the tumble drier, but this is thought unlikely, as socks can go missing even when left hanging to dry.
My house must be infested with these little buggers. I even bought a "sock bag" to prevent foot wear loss but they still go missing. Based on the consumption of socks in my household we either have about 10 of the vermin or one honking huge one that could probably eat the dryer in one go.
My mission today - after i've done the other 1001 things I actually need to do today - is to hunt the little fecker down!